"We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps." - Proverbs 16:9
A month ago, I had the entire year planned out. Those that know me well know that I tend to plan ahead, and now that I am sharing custody of my son and learning how to be a single parent while juggling a full time job, my planning has gotten that much more detailed. In some ways, I have to plan ahead- yet in other ways, I know it is a way for me to feel in control of my life.
That is what made things feel that much more out of control when COVID-19 started sweeping the globe. As I have watched it steamroll across the nation and gradually move closer to my small Alaskan town, the world as I knew it has changed.
Facing a global pandemic is hard in any situation, but as a newly single person whose entire biological family lives 4,000 miles away, it is scary. Adding social distancing to the mix by eliminating all of the activities I typically participate in has taken away physical interaction with my entire support group in one fell swoop.
Thankfully, I am blessed to still have a job. However, it is not possible for me to work from home. So I am tasked with figuring out how to take care of my son, ensure that he gets an education in the absence of school, and yet still work full time.
The trip I had been planning to visit my family will likely be cancelled. My ex has just let me know that his work schedule might be changing, which could change when I have my son and further negate any of the diligent planning for the year that I had done.
Figure in the uncertainty of the availability of supplies at the grocery store, the possibility of myself or my son getting sick or quarantined, the potential for me to get laid off from my job, and any other number of possible scenarios, and it is impossible to plan even two days in advance, much less two weeks.
Don't get me wrong- I realize I have much to be thankful for. I also realize that we as a nation and Alaska as a state likely have weeks of this uncertainty before we can return to some semblance of normalcy.
This whole experience is a stark reminder that we can plan ahead all we want- but like Proverbs 16:9 says, "...the Lord determines our steps." Even the best, most well-intended plans can fail. When they do, we can rest in the assurance that God has a plan for our lives, and for us, that is far better than we could ever imagine, much less plan out on paper.
For now, I'm going to try and take things a day at a time- and whatever I write in my planner will be in pencil.
"'For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord', 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.'" -Jeremiah 29:11
Recommended Reading:
Serenity Prayer
Embracing Change
Joy Comes in the Morning